Have you ever cried so much that the next day your eyes hurt???
Well, I have more than once but last night for me seemed like the worst for so many things happend and I am not sure if they are my fault or if any one is to blame for this. But the facts are I felt left out of an outting and I feel that I have lost my two best friends and yet this time i don’t know what I did wrong. I am a jelous person I will admit taha tbut I try to be as ressonalbe and as fair as I can. I don’t like being left out of the loop for I feel lost but then everyone wants you to feel like you belong well how can you when you feel lost. I just wnat to be loved as I love them but i Have to realize that the lonly love like that can come from God for right now no one other than my blood family loves me like that and I am very thankful for them by loving me,
My mother thinks I am going though a nother depressive state adn she says it is because my boyfriend and i broke up. But I think she is right but i do not wnat to admit it to myslef for that means I love him more than i ever thought and it would hurt more fior i know he dose not love me that way. But nothing right now is making me happy nothing i do and nothign i use to love makes me happy i want to be happy I wnat to enjoy life but waking up each morning is getting harder and Harder. But my prayers I know should be for me but i cna’t help but feel selfish when i pray for myself and there are so many other people who i am close to who need my prayers than I that i don’t know what to do I want to be happy yet i don’t know where to begin to be happy anymore. I love you all who read this Thank you for your support and I will write more when i have time and do not feel like crying. Thank you